It’s been over a month since I’ve last posted anything, and I blame the business of life for getting in the way. I don’t have words to describe the whirlwind of events and emotions that I’ve experienced during my absence on this blog. But to be honest, I’m not ready to share that with all of you yet. To say the least, I’ve entered a very happy chapter in my life. It’s new, exciting, and thrilling but at the same time, unpredictable and maybe a little bit risky. For all I know, it’s a beautiful chaos that I one day hope to share when the timing feels right.
But I didn’t create this post to talk about my feelings or thoughts. Today, I wanted to share this beautiful poem created by one of the people I hold closest to my heart.
Janielle, I’m so proud of who you are becoming. It’s been a blessing for me to see you grow and mature into the girl God has created you to be these past couple of years. It’s a privilege for me to be able to share your work which only shows the joy and strength you live with despite whatever life throws at you. I can’t use words to tell you what it means to have someone like you in my life. I hope you enjoy seeing your own words and feelings on my blog. 🙂
CYCLE OF EMOTIONS
I know that I am slowly breaking on the inside,
but I will not let my emotions show.
“When will I see you again, do you even care?”
-That I do not know.
Suddenly, real tears are escaping, like a bird out of her cage.
Quickly, I make sure not a single soul sees me crying like an infant.
Clear and colorful memories turn into a black and white nothing,
the longing to see father once again is now crushing.
Suddenly, I feel the fire inside dying a little, and the flames decreasing.
Is this good or bad? -My emotions are deceiving.
Assuming I understand “hope,”
I say a silent prayer, thinking that I can cope.
Once again I wear the same superficial smile,
but I will soon get weary from this lifestyle.
Today will be the last day of hope, enough of bearing the days like this.
Forgetting everything just might give me more golden days of bliss.
No, please don’t say I’m giving up, but simply moving on, almost forgetting.
I don’t think that I will be regretting.
Finally, with self-assurance, I wipe away the last teardrop.
My delicate lips then slowly whisper for the last time, “Come back.”